Risk the Fall by Riley Hart

Author:Riley Hart [Hart, Riley]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Romance, Gay / Lesbian / LGBT
Amazon: B0CFBQM8D2
Goodreads: 196141458
Publisher: Riley Hart
Published: 2022-12-31T23:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Riven

“Parrish stayed the night again?” Grandma asked. I was outside smoking when she walked up. I’d expected this conversation but still hadn’t known how I would answer. Now that it was here, my reply wasn’t any more clear to me.

“Yep. Is that a problem?” was what I landed on, though I knew it wasn’t. Jesus, I was such a dick sometimes. The thing was, I didn’t know how not to be. Or hell, maybe I didn’t want to because that felt like one step closer to letting people in and either failing them the way I’d done Grandma or having them stab me in the back the way Rex had done me.

“You know it’s not, Riven, so don’t pretend you think otherwise. You could have told me you’re gay.”

I took another drag of my smoke, then put it out. “I’m not.” I didn’t look up at her.

“You could have told me you like men. Is that new, or…”

“It’s not new,” I admitted, then stood. It was hot, so I held my hand out for her, supporting her while she stepped onto the concrete, then leading her inside. “It didn’t happen in prison if that’s what you’re wondering. I just didn’t share it with people who didn’t need to know before.”

“The people who needed to know being the men you hooked up with?”

“Jesus, Grandma. Aren’t you too old to say hooked up?” There was nothing like talking about sex with his grandma to make a grown-ass man feel like an embarrassed teenager.

“Well, that’s what you do, isn’t it? You and Parrish are serious?”

“Christ, no.” I tugged my cap off and ran a hand through my hair. “Do we really have to talk about this?” I was thirty-one years old, after all.

“There’s not a better man out there than Parrish.”

I was seeing that. It was still hard for me to wrap my head around it. And I’d kissed him. What in the hell had that been about? It had felt like a compulsion, this need overtaking me. Like if I hadn’t let myself find out what his mouth tasted like, I would dissolve into nothing, which didn’t make sense because I already felt like I was nothing.

Reaching up, I brushed my fingers over my lips. Apples. I didn’t know how that made any sense, but Parrish had tasted like apples, the really sweet ones you got on a perfect fall day.

I told myself it was because it had been so long since I’d been close to someone like that. It was why I let him touch me, and why I touched him in the first place, why I’d fucked him too, but deep down, I knew that wasn’t true. Something about Parrish clicked with me, even though I didn’t understand it. I had known him most of my life and had never thought about kissing him and fucking him until now, but…but when I thought about it, I had wanted to take care of him, to protect him from the ugliness of our world.

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